2 posts tagged “hurt”

I know I haven't blogged for quite sometime. I will soon. Anyway, this is a favor for a very close friend... I just need to post this. She's been bad. We're hoping that this might reach him.....

She writes:

Tonight I try to keep my eyes shut
But tears just keep on flowing.
I'm like a river with no sea,
Clueless of where I'm going.

I fear what tomorrow brings
Will I still see the light of day?
I'm drowning in this misery
Do you ever wonder if I'm okay?

How does everything end
Faster than a blink of an eye?
I didn't even get the chance
To hold you, touch you, ask why

Please help me comprehend
Why I walk alone this one way road
This should've been me and you
But now you treat me so cold

Give me just a little of your time
To get you back, I won't dare try
My heart just needs reasons
To have the strength to say goodbye.

I hope you find time to talk to her.

I got what I had expected. My feared moment came. Days before yesterday, I was hoping and praying that it wouldn't have to come to this.. but it was beyond my control. I tried so hard to be as civil as possible and I think I passed the test. But my friends sensed what was building up inside of me. I tried to put up a front, but my friends saw right through me. So they practically emulated the mixture of angst and hurt I was feeling deep inside. As I said in my last entry, I lost something and its because of a particular girl. Last night at a get-together, she just had to rain on my parade. I hate it that I can't seem to get myself to be mad at the person who brought her there... him.

I know it sounds peculiar that I keep talking about losing something. When in fact, all this is about a certain guy. To clear things, I know I didn't lose HIM (for as long as I still exist in his world, and he exists in mine). I lost, however, a possibility of something good. People would ask, "didn't you guys have a "thing" before?" Its that THING that matters, and I lost it. It could've been something more....................

I thought I was over this whole issue, then I realized that I just got so used to it. I said a month ago that I'd be okay.. my condition though was that "for as long as I'm not reminded of how he hurt me."

Not only was I reminded. I felt it once again.